In this episode of our relationship podcast Something Like Marriage, we talk about depression and marriage from two viewpoints – how it feels to be the person suffering from depression and how it affects the partner/spouse in the relationship.
Depression and Marriage Were Normal
My depression became apparent to me after having children and my doctor named this sadness that I had felt since I was young. Depression had become such a normal thing in my life that it didn’t feel like something I needed to get help for, until that day in the doctor’s office. I was at a point in my life where caring for myself and the family had become unmanageable and I could hardly get out of bed in the morning.
She said, “the result of your questionnaire indicates that you are severely depressed. Can you tell me more about this?”
Of course, I didn’t want to tell her more about it as the shame swelled in my throat. I felt like a bad mom, a bad person, and weak. Something shameful was alive in my life and I had no idea how it got there or how to heal it.
Jon listened to me talk about my sad days to the depth I would let him in. He worked a full-time job while I was at home with the three kids. He never knew what emotional state I would be in when he returned home. He felt helpless.
My depression journey changed once I could admit to myself that I needed help and could let Jon be part of that healing journey.
(Theme music: Ethan Anderson, Photo credit: Volkan Olmez)
Relationship Podcast Gems:
- Depression is not something you can will your way out of alone
- Depression grows with isolation, anxiety, guilt, and shame
- Sharing your depression with a loved one releases the secret and begins a journey of togetherness to healing
Stream “The Two Sides of Depression”
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